I'm going to share a few basic things we are dealing with right now more as a reminder to myself so that I can come back later and expand on them.
I mentioned in my last blog that the woman who was our main contact at the residential center was suddenly no longer working there. We were just getting to know the woman who took her place and I just found out today that she quit. UGH!
On Wednesday our Crider and Regional center caseworkers had a meeting with the supervisors at the residential center to get some things clarified and express concern about the lack of communication and lack of consistency in care. The supervisors were awesome. They stepped right up and created a fantastic action plan. If they really follow through I think we are on a good track to be making progress.
In that meeting we learned that someone (I don't feel comfortable saying who yet because this is public but I will as soon as it is resolved) who is involved in Oksana's care did some things that could be considered abuse. I will explain more about what she did as well later. After discussing it with Crider and Regional it was decided that we would contact her supervisor and give her a chance to deal appropriately with it or we would hotline her. I talked to the supervisor tonight and she was extremely concerned and is already moving up the chain of command to deal with this. This person will not be part of Oksana's team anymore soon and if I get my way she will be fired because I don't believe she should be doing this job.
This is my reminder to myself to tell you more about Anya's behaviors and what we are learning. She is doing awesome but we have learned some triggers that haven't been a problem in the past. I'm sure they are appearing now because of all of the stress with Oksana and then her sudden disappearance. It's nothing we can't deal with, just a bummer that we even have to.
Evan got braces today! He's feeling the pain but overall said that they whole experience hasn't been as bad as he thought it would be. Today Evan was also diagnosed with anxiety. I will share more about that soon too.
Clayton has been a part of the technical theater team, building sets, etc and this weekend is the big show. I can't wait to see it. It is the ballet Giselle. He recently expressed interest in getting involved in musical theater. I'm shocked. Absolutely shocked. I'm also thrilled that he is stepping out of his box and whether he enjoys it or not I think it will be an awesome experience.
Sorry for all of the vague descriptions but it is late and I have to get up early! I'll be back soon!
Thursday, October 22, 2015
Monday, October 12, 2015
So this is what "normal" feels a bit like
I have to say....I can't remember the last time I felt so relaxed and really got to focus on my kids, myself, and my husband. Let me tell you a bit of what has been going on here.
Shortly after Oksana left and I started to turn my focus back to my other kids I noticed a couple of things about Evan. First is that the more independent he gets the more we are seeing that all of the things about Evan that we thought were "carelessness", "rushing", "ditzy", "forgetful", are actually far more than that. The older and more independent he gets the more we see some things about Evan impacting his life. We recently went to a psychologist and it is looking likely that Evan will be diagnosed with ADD (which is now called the inattentive type of ADHD). The other thing I focused on was finally getting him to an orthodontist. His teeth aren't bad overall but he has one tooth that can not come down into place because it is hitting the tooth next to it. Guess who is getting braces in about 10 days? In other news he is very active at the barn. They have started an equestrian team for jr high and high school and he will have an opportunity to letter in the sport! He is going to be competing twice this month and has been volunteering his time working at the barn on Saturdays to learn more and earn free riding time. I spend a lot of time back and forth between home and the barn!
Clayton has been taking a technical theater class and right now they are working hard on an amazing set for Giselle, a ballet the school is doing in 2 weeks. I'm not a big ballet person but since Clayton is part of the crew and 3 of the kids that are in his high school class are in it I am going to go. I'm actually pretty excited about it if for no other reason than to see these kids do what they love! I'll post pictures of the set as soon as I can. He has also been working 2 days a week as a janitor at our church. He seems to like it overall, and it is teaching him a lot of great skills. Now if only I could get him to drive. He has his license, has no desire to drive, and acts tortured when I make him.
Anya, Anya, Anya....always an adventure with this kid. She is continuing to make great progress with her behavior therapist. I am thrilled. She went to orientation for the pageant last week and made quite an impression on everyone! At one point she was trying to steal the microphone from the lady presenting so she could sing. I don't think we will have a problem getting her on stage. We might, however, have a problem getting her off! Last week she joined a special needs cheer squad. Let me tell you....this girl is in heaven! She absolutely loves cheering! For once I get to just be the mom. She has an awesome one on one helping her! This squad goes year round and does local competitions. Wait until you see the uniform. Oh my, she is going to look precious! Yesterday they started working on stunts. At first she wanted absolutely nothing to do with it but little by little she got higher and higher. Now she calls it flying and wants to be up all the time!
Friday was supposed to be our first family therapy session with Oksana. Her main therapist is Jennifer and she was our contact person for everything, and the main contact for Crider and Regional Center. She was also our main contact when Oksana was there earlier in the year. She knows our family well so when we found out that Crider required family therapy she immediately said she wanted to be our therapist. We set up a time that we could be sure she would be there. On Monday she sent me a text and verified the time for Friday. On Friday I sent her a text asking where she wanted us to meet her and got no response. So I called and got no answer. We went ahead to the main desk and told them we were there for family therapy with Jennifer. They told us to have a seat and we waited, and waited, and waited. Finally someone came in and asked us to join them in a meeting room. When we all got in there she said "There is no good way to tell you this. Jennifer is no longer with us." I was SHOCKED....like jaw on the floor shocked. I still don't know what happened. Long story short we met the woman replacing her, ended up just having a visit with Oksana, and rescheduled family therapy for the next week.
We had a rather good visit with Oksana. We laughed and talked had a nice time. If you aren't my facebook friend, you have to hear this story. She was telling me that Betch, one of her hallucinations, talks about one of the girls that is in residential with her. I asked what Betch says. She told me that Betch doesn't understand why she calls the staff "Betches" and "Holes". Now Oksana does not understand cuss words so this is what she thinks the girl is calling the staff but you can put two and two together and figure out what she is really calling them! So I tried to play it off as no big deal and told her that was pretty silly to which she replied "The staff sure doesn't think so!!" I died laughing! These are some of the benefits of that intellectual disability!
Larry and I are getting ready for a weekend away together in a couple of weeks! I.CAN'T.WAIT! We are going to go to a Weekend to Remember marriage conference. These are the conferences that FamilyLife does and that is the ministry we worked for in Little Rock. We are so excited to get to see some old friends from the ministry and spend a weekend focusing on each other. It will be awesome :).
In other news we have a new family member! Our nephew, Zaine, was born earlier this week. He is so cute! I love having another boy in the family. My in laws have 7 grandchildren now and our 2 boys were the only boys for a long time. Here are some pictures from the first time we met him.
I think that updates you for now. I'll be back soon to share more!
Shortly after Oksana left and I started to turn my focus back to my other kids I noticed a couple of things about Evan. First is that the more independent he gets the more we are seeing that all of the things about Evan that we thought were "carelessness", "rushing", "ditzy", "forgetful", are actually far more than that. The older and more independent he gets the more we see some things about Evan impacting his life. We recently went to a psychologist and it is looking likely that Evan will be diagnosed with ADD (which is now called the inattentive type of ADHD). The other thing I focused on was finally getting him to an orthodontist. His teeth aren't bad overall but he has one tooth that can not come down into place because it is hitting the tooth next to it. Guess who is getting braces in about 10 days? In other news he is very active at the barn. They have started an equestrian team for jr high and high school and he will have an opportunity to letter in the sport! He is going to be competing twice this month and has been volunteering his time working at the barn on Saturdays to learn more and earn free riding time. I spend a lot of time back and forth between home and the barn!
Clayton has been taking a technical theater class and right now they are working hard on an amazing set for Giselle, a ballet the school is doing in 2 weeks. I'm not a big ballet person but since Clayton is part of the crew and 3 of the kids that are in his high school class are in it I am going to go. I'm actually pretty excited about it if for no other reason than to see these kids do what they love! I'll post pictures of the set as soon as I can. He has also been working 2 days a week as a janitor at our church. He seems to like it overall, and it is teaching him a lot of great skills. Now if only I could get him to drive. He has his license, has no desire to drive, and acts tortured when I make him.
Anya, Anya, Anya....always an adventure with this kid. She is continuing to make great progress with her behavior therapist. I am thrilled. She went to orientation for the pageant last week and made quite an impression on everyone! At one point she was trying to steal the microphone from the lady presenting so she could sing. I don't think we will have a problem getting her on stage. We might, however, have a problem getting her off! Last week she joined a special needs cheer squad. Let me tell you....this girl is in heaven! She absolutely loves cheering! For once I get to just be the mom. She has an awesome one on one helping her! This squad goes year round and does local competitions. Wait until you see the uniform. Oh my, she is going to look precious! Yesterday they started working on stunts. At first she wanted absolutely nothing to do with it but little by little she got higher and higher. Now she calls it flying and wants to be up all the time!
Friday was supposed to be our first family therapy session with Oksana. Her main therapist is Jennifer and she was our contact person for everything, and the main contact for Crider and Regional Center. She was also our main contact when Oksana was there earlier in the year. She knows our family well so when we found out that Crider required family therapy she immediately said she wanted to be our therapist. We set up a time that we could be sure she would be there. On Monday she sent me a text and verified the time for Friday. On Friday I sent her a text asking where she wanted us to meet her and got no response. So I called and got no answer. We went ahead to the main desk and told them we were there for family therapy with Jennifer. They told us to have a seat and we waited, and waited, and waited. Finally someone came in and asked us to join them in a meeting room. When we all got in there she said "There is no good way to tell you this. Jennifer is no longer with us." I was SHOCKED....like jaw on the floor shocked. I still don't know what happened. Long story short we met the woman replacing her, ended up just having a visit with Oksana, and rescheduled family therapy for the next week.
We had a rather good visit with Oksana. We laughed and talked had a nice time. If you aren't my facebook friend, you have to hear this story. She was telling me that Betch, one of her hallucinations, talks about one of the girls that is in residential with her. I asked what Betch says. She told me that Betch doesn't understand why she calls the staff "Betches" and "Holes". Now Oksana does not understand cuss words so this is what she thinks the girl is calling the staff but you can put two and two together and figure out what she is really calling them! So I tried to play it off as no big deal and told her that was pretty silly to which she replied "The staff sure doesn't think so!!" I died laughing! These are some of the benefits of that intellectual disability!
Larry and I are getting ready for a weekend away together in a couple of weeks! I.CAN'T.WAIT! We are going to go to a Weekend to Remember marriage conference. These are the conferences that FamilyLife does and that is the ministry we worked for in Little Rock. We are so excited to get to see some old friends from the ministry and spend a weekend focusing on each other. It will be awesome :).
In other news we have a new family member! Our nephew, Zaine, was born earlier this week. He is so cute! I love having another boy in the family. My in laws have 7 grandchildren now and our 2 boys were the only boys for a long time. Here are some pictures from the first time we met him.
I think that updates you for now. I'll be back soon to share more!
Thursday, October 1, 2015
Head Shots
I just registered Anya for the pageant. I'm still laughing about the whole thing! Here are the head shots my friend took! I chose the one at the bottom. Even though the other 2 are amazing the one at the bottom is best for the purposes. She is so cute!
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