At each Weekend to Remember there is a session where the men and the women are separated. While the men are encouraged in the area of being a husband and father, the women are hearing a wonderful message on being a wife and mother. Larry and I were recently listening to a CD of one of the sessions for women. The speaker said something that really struck me. She asked a group of men if they thought that their wives loved them. They all agreed that their wives did love them. Then she asked if they thought that their wives liked them and almost none of them could say for sure that their wives liked them. My first reaction was "How can that be?" Well, she answered that too. She reminds us that growing up our husband's parents cheered them on, encouraged them, and told them "Good job" in many areas of their lives. As they grew and became more independent they got a job and their bosses praised them for their hard work. There were probably many areas in their lives where they were encouraged and told "good job" for what they did. Then they get married and their wives say "Why can't you take the trash out when I ask?" or "Why are you at work so long?" and all they hear is "BOOOOO"...."You aren't doing a good job." Hence the reason that they now think their wife doesn't like them even though they love them.
That was eye opening to me. The first thing I did was ask Larry if he thought I liked him. To my relief he said yes but I wanted examples. I didn't want him to just say yes because he thought that is what I would want to hear. I wanted him to tell me what I do that makes him sure that I like him. After I was confident in his answer I made a commitment to myself to be careful that I convey to him through my actions and my words that I don't only love him, I also like him. I want to be the person that he hears "good job!" from. That doesn't come easy when I am being selfish (who me?!) but as is always the case in marriage this is more about making me more like Christ than it is about making me happy.
On another note Fireproof was #4 in theaters opening weekend! It showed on 839 screens and shocked movie critics who didn't think it could make it into the top 10 since the other top movies played on thousands of screens! The weekend of October 10th they will add 300 new screens because of the overwhelming success. Praise God!
Also, this weekend I will be attending a women's retreat in Hot Springs Arkansas. It is all FamilyLife staff women and should be a lot of fun. I come back home on Sunday and then Monday night the couple that we are coaching will be staying with us. We are very excited to see them again.
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