OK now on to the Self Regulation. I have been doing TONS of research on parenting children that come from trauma an neglect. Oh how I wish I had known this stuff long ago but I guess in a sense you need to live it before you can realize how bad you need help. I recently took a class offered at my church on parenting adopted and foster children. It was based on the books The Connected Child by Karyn Purvis and Beyond Consequences, Logic, and Control by Heather Forbes. It was an amazing class but I won't get into that right now. Since then I have been re-reading these books and I've been watching a video series by Karyn Purvis called Trust Based Parenting. On top of it all, Larry and I are looking into going to a counselor that we know from our church who was trained by Karyn Purvis in Therapeutic Parenting. We really see results in ourselves and in Oksana when we use these methods so I've become a bit obsessed with learning more.
Having said all of that I wanted to share this idea that I am really excited about. In the Purvis video we are watching she talks about teaching kids how to self regulate. Oksana can get pretty easily disregulated, and if it isn't dealt with that tends to be when we see her lose control and rage, so I'm jumping on this self regulation idea. We've actually started by teaching her the word self regulation so she knows exactly what it means. We all use different methods to self regulate (deep breathing, counting, etc.). One idea I'm going to use is something I found on Pinterest and it was such a great idea for self regulation whether your kids come from trauma or not that I had to share it. If you are on Pinterest you may have seen it.
It is a bottle full of glitter. When you make it you find a mix of water and glue that will allow the glitter to settle at the speed you are looking for. I chose 5 minutes. Mine takes longer than that but it's close enough. It was hard to get that perfect mixture. She absolutely loves it. The goal is that if she is disregulated she can shake it up and watch the glitter settle to calm down or if she is in time out she can watch it settle and when it is at the bottom she can get out. We just made them today so I'm anxious to see how they work in action but if they do what I think they will I may send one to school too. You can find instructions and much better pictures of it HERE. If you make one let me know how it worked!
5 comments:
That mind jar is really cool! I would like to make one for myself, actually! I am going to try it this week. :)
That is such an amazing idea on so many levels!
I'm in the middle of "The Connected Child" right now. I checked it out from the library at Trisha Weber's recommendation, but after reading it, I know I need to go buy it. It is so practical, and so good. I LOVE the glitter bottle. I'm going to make one for our little Jessi, who deals with self regulation issues. Thanks so much for sharing, and I can't wait to hear how this works for Oksana!
I love practical ideas like this! Thanks for sharing!!
There is a blog, I think it is called Life in the Grateful House that is about a mother raising a child of trauma. She has tried a number of things, some of them quite successful, to help her daughter cope with the effects of RAD and trauma. It might be worth checking into.
Good luck!
Post a Comment