School Decision

I have some surprising but very good news from today's IEP meeting to determine a school placement for Oksana.  Let me back up a few steps.  You know that we had an IEP meeting before Christmas to discuss moving Oksana to a new school with a program designed for kids with more significant behaviors.  The plan was to have representatives from each of those programs come see Oksana and then for Larry and I to observe them.  Then we were to come together again and make a decision.  Although the snow days impacted our ability to visit the other schools, they were able to come out and meet Oksana, so we did still meet today. 

After that first meeting we had a week or 2 before Christmas and in that time we really started to be surprised by the number of good days Oksana was having.  Her new mood stabilizer was significantly decreasing her outward aggression and her teacher was learning more about trauma and trying some new things to help Oksana.  The combination of the two really seemed to be making a difference and at one point, right before Christmas, I remember talking to her teacher and saying, "Do you think they will keep her here?"  Of course she didn't know, but it was interesting that we were seeing changes.

After break we saw more of the same.  Oksana's teacher noticed an area where she was seeing an increase in behavior and it was surrounding rewards.  Her paras, who really love her, were giving her little trinkets and "rewards" throughout the day.  Oksana would often come home with little bracelets, hair ties, etc.  Well the teacher noticed that Oksana was using that to  manipulate and control. For example, they would go to get a drink and Oksana would refuse to go bacl into the classroom.  She would try to negotiate a reward to go back in.  Once her teacher asked her to do something and she said "What are you going to give me?"  As soon as that clicked the teacher put firm boundaries on her rewards.  She then held a meeting with her entire staff and told them that they must follow the same exact boundaries down to the same wording if they are with Oksana.  Black and white is the only option at this point because Oksana uses grey to manipulate.  They have seen immediate results from that decision.....and that leads us to today.

It was decided that at this point it would cause more trauma than benefit to move Oksana and she will be staying in her current school.  We all know Oksana is not cured.  We all know that the time will come again when she will lose control....growth spurts, developmental milestones, hormones, etc. can all cause significant challenges in kiddos like her.  It was agreed that Larry and I should still go tour the other schools and be proactive in our decision instead of rushing to make a decision when it is an emergency.  We will have a good idea of what each of the programs offers and we will be ready when Oksana will benefit more from another school. 

I love good news..... :)